Day 1

“In eternity there is indeed something true and sublime. But all these times and places and occasions are now and here.” -Thoreau

This is a blog about moving to another country for a bit. It is a travel narrative, but it is also the story of deciding to change my life. Obviously, that decision is the first change. Here goes the rest— riding the back of adventure, purpose, pursuit, desire, fortitude, and good will.

What I’m done with= no, I can’t, I didn’t, I won’t.

I think everyone is their best when they are themselves, their deliberate, authentic selves, so this blog is also a place for recording what it is like when you choose to open to all possibilities.

Day 1- Don’t think about being scared. Tell myself I am not scared because telling myself that re-conceptualizes the idea of fear. I am excited. I am saying Yes.

You need another person only to live a certain kind of life. I was remiss for so many years, maybe every year up until the last one, maybe until 6 months ago, when I realized I don’t need another person to live happily, just to live that one kind of life that I wanted for myself, but required another person. Like I was trying to squeeze all my hopes into one hope that didn’t fit with the person I forced it onto. A partner and babies and all that is a life a want, but it is not the only life. Tell myself: it is not one story, but a stand in the braid of many stories.

My friend said to me on the day I announced my divorce, “Sophie, you can wake up into the life you want, one that is fully your own.”